KPI indicator?

Got this via email by Kas..hehe cool

Can we all use this for our KPI Indicator?   
Outgoing Personality - Always going out of the office 
Great Presentation Skills - Able to bullshit 
Good Communication Skills - Spends lots of time on phone 
Work Is First Priority - Too ugly to get a date
Active Socially - Drink a lot 
Independent Worker - Nobody knows what he/she does
Quick Thinking - Offer plausible excuses 
Careful Thinker - Won't make a decision 
Uses Logic On Difficult Jobs - Get someone else to do it 
Expresses Themselves Well - Speaks English
Meticulous Attention To Detail - A nit picker 
Has Leadership Qualities - Is tall or has a louder voice 
Exceptionally Good Judgement - Lucky 
Keen Sense Of Humour - Knows a lot of dirty jokes 
Career Minded - Backstabber
Loyal - Can't get a job anywhere else

Soo..for those who is still on the rat race...which one are you or which one you prefer to be...hehe

PEACE